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..Inventions for Dumb Blonds..
Ice Cube Mix
Garage Door Closer
Fire Proof Matches
Reversible Sandwich Bread
Black Light Bulb
Cordless Cell Phone
Disposable Garbage Bags
..Definition of eternity?Four blondes in four cars at a four-way stop.
A blonde was swerving all over the road and driving very badly, so she got pulled over by a cop. The cop walked up to her window and asked, “Miss, why are you driving so recklessly?”
The blonde said, “I’m sorry sir, but wherever I go, there’s always a tree in front of me and I can’t seem to get away from it!”
The cop looked at her and said, “Lady, that’s your air freshener!”
1. Q: How do blonde braincells die?
2. Q: What do you call it when a blonde dies their hair brunette?
3. Q: Did you hear about the blond skydiver?
A2: Artificial intelligence..
A3 She missed the Earth!
..MORE OLE DUMB BLONDS..
..A broke blonde decides to ask God for help. “Dear Lord,” she prays, “if I don’t get some cash, I’m gonna lose everything. Please let me win the lottery.”
..Lottery night comes, but the blonde doesn’t win. She prays even harder, saying, “God, why have you forsaken me? My children are starving. Please just let me win this once.”
Suddenly there is a blinding flash of light, and the blonde hears God speak.
“Sweetheart, work with me on this,” he says. “Buy a ticket.”
..Painting Blonde..This blonde decides one day that she is sick and tired of all these blonde jokes and how all blondes are perceived as stupid, so she decides to show her husband that blondes really are smart..
While her husband is off at work, she decides that she is going to paint a couple of rooms in the house. The next day, right after her husband leaves for work, she gets down to the task at hand.
Her husband arrives home at 5:30 and smells the distinctive smell of paint. He walks into the living room and finds his wife lying on the floor in a pool of sweat. He notices that she is wearing a ski jacket and a fur coat at the same time. He goes over and asks her if she is ok. She replies yes.
He asks what she is doing. She replies that she wanted to prove to him that not all blonde women are dumb and she wanted to do it by painting the house. He then asks her why she has a ski jacket over her fur coat. She replies that she was reading the directions on the paint can and they said….
FOR BEST RESULTS, PUT ON TWO COATS. ——————————